Maria†Holic Final Episode FINALLY!

Oh Dear Lord. Finally. Thank you for finally ending this awful series. I am not sure WHO I am thanking but thank you. My eyes and brain are very grateful.

The end of this series WOOHOO!

Of course if I was really that unhappy with the show I could have stopped watching it a long time ago. Apparently I didn't get the memo that you don't have to watch every single episode of a series if it bores you to tears or it makes you want to rip your hair out.

Part of me thought maybe the series would get interesting, that I wasn't giving it a fair chance. But another part of me just wanted to finish what I started. I wanted to give people a very honest opinion of this show. Most of the time people about a show when they really love it. With this show I wanted to make sure people knew it wasn't rainbows and cupcakes.

Not that ANY of that matters as I have hardly seen anyone regularly blogging this series. Maybe everyone did realize it sucked and gave up a long time ago. I am special that way. XD But here it is anyway, my final impressions of this special show.

WTF Death Note time?

Episode 12 Summary:
Boobies.

And lots of them.

Oh, that sounds a little familiar. This awesome series wouldn’t just focus on one part of the human anatomy right?! RIGHT?!

What do you mean this series is shallow?!

Swimsuits and boobies.

FOR THE WIN! Right boys?

FINE! I will try to write a real summary. Kanako is updating her mother on her life. A lot has happened in the 3 months since she entered this school and it almost sounds like she has changed. But she hasn’t. She really is just looking forward to summer and the chance to see everyone in a swimsuit. She then experiences the perfect opening day at the pool. Everyone gets to wear whatever skanky bathing suit they want, their swim coach is beyond hot, and Kanako has a nose bleed due to all the lovely boobies. The hot swim coach molests her breasts a little bit as she has to do CPR. Suddenly everyone in the entire series is lining up to give Kanako CPR and Kanako smirks to herself. So does Maria as he informs Kanako this has all been a dream. The events leading up to her dream were real..or just the part where she ate so much raw liver (to help stop nose bleeds) she got sick and was passed out for 10 days or something. Kanako is not pleased with the news.

Because this totally happened.

Father Kanae is walking around campus worried about Kanako. It has been days since her liver poisoning and he is worrying about WHY she would do such a thing! Kanako has slightly recovered and is awaiting the moment where she can go to the pool. Father Kanae arrives at her dorm room with a melon in hand. Insert the most stupid conversation in the world. Kanako would mumble a stupid word when touched and Father Kanae would try to figure out what the heck she means. Matsurika and Maria watch on either amused or find them rather pathetic. In the end Kanako breaks out in hives and can’t go to the pool the next day either.

Melons....yes I caught on to that.

Kanako tries to regain her high spirits as she has recovered from her hives. But then she starts finding food products all in her stuff again but the original gang claims they only focus on marine products. These are clearly land products. And this matters for some reason. In any event Kanako tries to look on the bright side of life and eat these wonderful foods. Only she overeats and is unable to go swimming the next day.

Hurry! Time is running out!

In the next stupid scenario Kanako decides that she needs to guard her stomach from such attacks. She is going to visit dorm school god and ask her to make her some more calming foods. However dorm room god has decided that now is the time to go down memory lane. She is looking at an old swimsuit and gets a weird look on her face. Kanako picks that moment to walk in…and dorm room god decides to punish Kanako for finding out her secret and Kanako goes missing. She misses swimming the next day.

What exactly happened? Did I miss something?

Kanako steps up her game plan and does everything perfectly. She is ready for ANYTHING…and then it rains. Parts of Kanako dies inside. Kanako thinks she has missed her chance to see all the lovelies in their swimsuits but there is a swim meet to come. Kanako goes to bed happy. Maria is upset at that happiness so he orders Matsurika to use her mind altering technique on Kanako. Now Kanako desires loin clothes and not swimsuits. Kanako is upset that she is unable to enjoy all the school swimsuits around her. Father Kanae comes up and decides that Kanako desires to see him in a red loin cloth. It makes sense in his scary head. Kanako decides this is ALL Maria’s fault and she will expose Maria who is wearing a set of fake boobies. They are playing a game of chicken (or at least I think that is what it is still called) and Kanako goes INSANE to expose the boobies. But it turns out Maria’s twin sister is actually the one in the pool and her real boobies get shown to the world. Maria laughs in the shadows and Kanako’s nose bleed covers the entire world. Kanako wakes up to Shizu looking out for her. Suddenly Shizu notices Kanako’s pendant…AND THE END!

Boring cliffhanger is BORING!

MMMM the final episode didn’t disappointment me. I was actually hoping the last episode was going to suck so I could go I WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG in my post. And I got my wish. Yay me.

I live to not be disappointed.

I understand that Kanako is a stupid pervert. I think everyone watching this stupid series realized that. So what was the last episode about? Boobies. How classy. This show wasn’t smart enough to make Kanako a different kind of pervert. No, instead of being sly about her obsession let’s just do the obvious. And that of course is to focus on boobies. Boobies are easy and fun for everyone!

And boobies she got!

Even though I already hate these kinds of fan service episodes this one was really done in poor taste and low brow type of humor. Kanako hasn’t gotten a clue yet in 12 episodes…go her.

Me thinks momma in heaven is not very impressed.

Watching her suffer was fun though. Only because I hate her and wish ill on all she ever does. The scenarios that she found herself in her over the top and kind of stupid but I like the premise behind Kanako being miserable. YAY FOR TEARS!

RAIN MORE!

Maria once again was awesome in this episode. He is the voice of morality in this series despite him…you know, breaking a major rule. His disgust is the same as in every other episode so nothing really new to report here. It was just awesome watching Kanako try some last ditch effort to expose Maria and Kanako failing hard.

Me thinks that Kanako shouldn't have been born at all but oh well...

Nanami, Sachi, And Inamori kept asking where Kanako is and quite frankly I am not sure why they even care. She hasn’t been a very good friend to any of these people and when she is around them she is a freak. If I knew someone who was constantly having nose bleeds and checking out my boobies…I would steer clear of them at all costs. You would think they would be fed up with her perverted ways but they must like pain…like me.

Just be happy...be happy and dance free.

Father Kanae was once again very special in this episode. I do not understand even 10 percent of his references so it is hard to find them funny and not stupid. But if Kanako stopped hating men for 10 minutes she could hook up with him and make some nice special babies. In loin clothes of course.

Seriously B Minor.

So what is there to say about this series? I actually had a list of things I wanted to talk about…but then I realized I truly didn’t care and I rather get this post over and done with now that more interesting series are starting up. I guess I will cover a few basics.

That totally happened.

Kanako is a dirty pervert. She was not a lesbian. She doesn’t understand what it is like to love another human being. She just thinks since boys give her hives she HAS to like girls. Because they are soft and boobies are fun. But what then? What after the initial naked moment? What are you going to do with a relationship based on just looks?

WTF is with all these ugly faces?!

Those questions are never answered. Kanako NEVER has any character growth. If anything she gets worse. She accepts her perverted ways and blames Maria for yelling and poking fun at her. She never learns that being in a relationship is more than panties and a pretty face. If she mended her perverted ways and actually saw women as real human beings I would be okay with it. But since she is just disgusting I refuse to see her as a lesbian. Just your run of the mill psychopath.

Please just die. XD Thanks.

Maria was one of the most interesting characters in this series. At times he was a little cruel but Kanako deserves what Maria dished out. I was hoping that Maria’s secret was exposed in the end and we could see sexy man Maria. But it was just as satisfy to see Maria get Kanako one last time. Keep on doing what you’re doing Maria but know that Kanako is never going to change.

I approve of partners in crime.

All the other characters were mostly around to be eye candy for Kanako. They were never explained too deeply and their problems were very childish and over dramatic. None of these people should have bothered with Kanako at all. I was going to say I wished there was more Ryuuken…but maybe it was good she stayed away from this hot mess.

I feel bad for those women.

The art style sucked. I said it 1000 times. There were way too many elements and it made the series look extremely lazy. It was hard to follow and at times pointless. I am not sure how I can expand on this point anymore.

What do you mean the art styles suck?!

So in conclusion, this series was a waste of my time and probably a lot of other people’s. Yes I did have moments where I did laugh, but not enough to counter the amount of times I rolled my eyes or YAWNED from boredom. I am sure many fan boys loved this show and the amount of girl on girl action (or dreamed action) and didn’t care that the substance in this show was severely lacking. Then let the fan boys have this show. I for one am glad they are done and won’t even bitch about how the ending was so open ended…there should be a second season. Because there shouldn’t. The end. WOOT!