Shining Hearts: Shiawase no Pan episode 12 FINAL EPISODE MOG THANK GOD

My husband just told me I have to get up at 7 am tomorrow. What? What is 7 am? Aren’t fun days off supposed to be carefree…not sleepy? The last time I got up at 7 am for fun was in Japan where my body was too confused to know what time it was. 7 am. What the heck is that?! 4th of July indeed.

Can we all agree that Rick has the grossest looking body armor ever?

Oh my Lord folks. It is already episode 12 of Shining Hearts: Shiawase no Pan. Spoilers for Tenchi pulling through and watching every episode!....woohoo.

So....if my town was being attacked...I would be in the basement. Not the closest I could possibly be to the death. Just saying.

Episode Summary: The first full minute of the show is devoted to Rick regetting his wings and Dylan being impressed with his flying abilities. Rick flies into the seal and sees Kaguya held up on a cross. Or a random giant stick. Rick might be more upset though that he already lost his sparkly wings. He runs to save her loveliness but random piles of goo attack him. After he finishes off the goo piles a giant Lizard men appears and won’t let Rick steal his Kaguya. Rick comments he doesn’t want Kaguya for her power and they fight. During all this the harp playing Prince talks about how this world was formed because of feelings. Everyone else in town just watches as the explosions happen around their town. Oh and the Princess uses some magical spells to protect Dylan’s ship from being blown up. Rick is nearly killed by the Lizard man but Kaguya’s necklace glows. At the same time Hank blows up his workhouse to blast the main ship. This wakes up Queen who then blasts the exact same hole only bigger. This all gives Rick enough time to stab the Lizard man and fly away with Kaguya.

Lizard people need no explanation! Accept it!

Kaguya and Rick end up on some beach. Rick is exhausted and Kaguya talks about bread. Kaguya also might have talked about how she didn’t want to ever hurt anyone again. Sometime later Kaguya is walking around the forest looking at bunnies with Queen watching her. Prince Harp is talking about how he will write a song about how amazing Rick is. Then it is about 5 whole minutes of all the minor characters in the show doing minor character stuff. The elves are eating bread, the kids at the church are eating bread, and Fiona is not eating bread because she is sad that Dylan is leaving town. The girls are passing out bread and hope Rick will return home soon. Hank is homeless and Xiao-Mei is set free to fix all the dolls in the world. Finally we get to Rick who is working with Madera to get his bread cooking skills back in tip top shape. She does a lot of talking and one would think she finally talk about the different dimensions. But she really is saying in a million words that Rick should follow down the path of making bread. The girls go to wake up Rick some time later…but he surprises them by already being awake and ready to join them in selling the bread of happiness. THE END!!!

That is how I feel after watching this show.

You know……I watched all 12 episodes of this hot mess and I am embarrassed. Embarrassed to say that I have earned that “I watched all 12 episodes of Shining Hearts” t-shirt. I wonder how much that will go for on Ebay? Or will everyone just laugh at me? I think I hear a few chuckles.

Silly Tenchi, thinking we were going to get a cute mascot or something.

If ANYONE cares…..the elves meant nothing, what parallel dimensions, and there is a witch making ice cream in the forest? Literally NOTHING was explained. NOTHING. About 90 percent of this piece of shit anime was devoted to the damn bread. People might say DUH it’s in the title Tenchi. Well I did not heed any warnings. Warnings that this show was going to be all about bread, bread, and more bread. The oven in the cover art means something!

I started to say something important....then I went back to playing the harp.

I mean….I thought there was going to be some sort of resolution about…ANYTHING! That things were going to mean something. I guess Ms. Ice Cream witch did feel like a side quest but everything else? I thought they (concepts or people) were going to be important. But the elves just sat in the woods with their cute mascot and ate bread. Fiona the bartender with the heart of gold ate bread. Dylan the pirate…realized that the plot was never going to happen and got the hell out of dodge. Oh there are animal people walking around? WELLLLLLL who cares?!? Why are you even asking? Psht of course they have ears and tails. Why would we have to explain something so basic as animal people?

Do you see Kaguya hanging there? That is what I wish happened to the bakery girls!

And the bakery girls? Worst characters on the face of the planet. That is different than characters I hate the most. These three girls….lacked anything. Mostly a brain. Even after the revelation that they had no memories and came from a different dimension they never desired any answers. To become more. To find out what happened to them. They were more concerned about how Rick would react to anything, like their lives had no meaning if their slave left town. Couldn’t ONE girl say oh I wish I knew about my past, it scares me being an empty slate? NO! Because they are worse than one dimensional characters. I am not sure how you can be a zero dimension character but here you go everyone! Three stupid girls wearing very appropriate outfits at all times.

We need to wrap this fight up so we can have 10 minutes of characters smiling and eating bread.

Did I mention the climactic battle lasted for like 5 whole seconds? No explanation of what Kaguya was, how the jewel gets it power, or why the Princess suddenly knows damn magic. We got Hank blowing up his whole damn house to put a hole in the warship that the nondead Queen made bigger later. Like good job Hank, that was TOTALLY necessary. And the Lizard Men are just blowed up. Like peace out who need to know about you anyway!

She just looks....a few french fries short of a Happy Meal.

I guess it would be too much to wonder why Kaguya was so important to Rick. I think they spent about 5 conscious minutes together. But now that the series is over I am glad she wasn’t on my screen more. She….how to word this without being a disrespectful person. Kaguya is like a child who maybe didn’t get enough oxygen at the time of her birth and bagging groceries might be too much for her to handle as a job. She was having a conversation with Rick…by parroting everything he was saying. It was pretty disturbing to watch. Like she almost was kidnapped by Lizard Men and nearly died…but wants to eat the mushed bread in Rick’s pocket. What the hell is wrong with her?

I think the Prince was just saying random things at this point.

I thought maybe Prince o Harps was trying to say something important. Like how he formed this world to protect lost souls from other dimensions. Or that he was given that task. But then he started talking about dreams and how we all have to wake up from them at one point…but to enjoy the time we have now. THEN he starts talking about how he has to write an epic ballad about Rick’s heroic deeds. So it is hard to tell if his words were real or dreamy. Or if they meant anything at all. And why would Rick mind a ballad about how he saved the island? Instead of saying anything important the Prince just acted drunk.

I....isn't that common sense? Did that need to be said?

Then I thought OH Madera will wrap up this story, about how she knows about the different dimensions and what the island is all about. WRONG! I am pretty sure she was just talking about bread and how Rick needs to focus on making bread. All that follow your path, the island is a safe place, blah blah! MOG FOLKS! The bread! I get that Rick might not want to follow the path of a warrior, especially if he fled that lifestyle. But shoving him down another career is wrong. Why is it so important that he makes bread? WHY?! Because you need a slave?! I think I am starting to lose my mind trying to make sense of this hot mess.

Rick found his sparkle. Isn't everyone happy?

So….in conclusion…Rick finds the magic in his heart again and all the girls are happy that their best worker is back. Because they are only good at not selling the bread and walking around town with baskets. They helped Rick find his way in life by making him make the best bread ever. And then the Lizard Men came back and leveled the entire Happy Go Lucky Kingdom. THE END!!!