DRAMAtical Murder episode 11: Aliens. Or something.

Sometimes when I watch animes I have to pause the show. My only language is English so I must read English subtitles and sometimes there is a lot text to read. Other times I am laughing so hard I have to pause things to catch my breath. But then there are times when I have to pause things because I have to make a face. Like as if someone else is in the room and I have to turn to confirm to said person that what we just saw was bizarre, stupid, or WTFness. Usually with a facial expression to sum up the feelings.

Don't be messing with cute Ren!

Well this post three of tonight...there was a lot of pausing. And there was pausing because of the third reason. I am not sure how much more convoluted this show could have gotten but it pushed the limits. The outer limits. Come experience the insanity with me. Here is DRAMAtical Murder episode 11. Spoilers for...everything.

Why are you doubting that Toue is the baddie?!

Episode Summary: Toue makes an announcement to his mostly brainwashed citizens to Platinum Jail. That he is going to have a huge ceremony in 2 days for the anniversary but first…a great piece of news. Toue has a son named Sei and here is he. Good thing most of these people are already brainwashed or they would have noticed how out of it this kid really was. After this announcement Quiet Kid Sei is placed in a chair and not looking so hot. He wants Aoba it seems. Elsewhere Aoba and Minks have woken up from Scrap land and Aoba is upset that Minks is on a suicide mission. He tells Minks to live when answers are not forthcoming. Minks responds that he is done with Aoba and is going on alone. Aoba is like um no you are my new best friend forever we must beat Toue! So Minks has plans to take nice Aoba on their little field trip but they are confronted by actual guards. They have orders not to shoot and Minks and Aoba get separated from each other in the chaos. Aoba wonders why he is allowed to live when he runs into a dead end. Just as things look pretty bad for Aoba…the door magically opens. Aoba thinks something is up and of course it is. Behold Sei the Quiet boy is there and TALKING! Happy to see Aoba. Of course Aoba has no idea who this poorly dressed guy is and is on edge. Sei shows Aoba that he has been the one sending the video games to him and the invite to Platinum Jail. Aoba is like oh so you made this trap that got all my new bestest friends hurt. Before Aoba can hate Sei forever Sei is like NOOOO I just wanted you to come see me. And break me with your power. Only you can do it Aoba….before Sei disappears into nothingness because he is just a hologram. Aoba stands there all confused like is this my life when he is hit on the head and knocked unconscious. Ah yes this is Aoba’s life. When he comes to he thinks all is okay when he sees his friends Virus and Trip but…he is tied to a chair so this is probably bad news. The not twins smile and say TADA we are Morphine and we work for Toue hahahaha. We know about your power and how valuable you are. Then they open their mouths and out comes a never ending story of what the hell.

I said sleep in shifts!

Once upon a time there was a crazy man named Toue who wanted to brainwash people and take over the world. He hired Grams to do research and uses the info to make designer babies. Aoba and his twin brother Sei were the result. They were connected by their hair which was actually a set of nerves. Both were born with special powers and Toue was like haha I will take over the world. Apparently Aoba was born dead (even though he didn’t look like it) and Grams was horrified her data was used in this way. So she ran away with dead Aoba to save him from being experimented on. But he came back to life and tada she raised him. This led only Sei to be experimented on as his eyes can brainwash people. Aoba grew up and started playing Rhyme. He used his Scrap power to hurt someone in the game and Virus and Trip changed Aoba’s memories and covered it up because while they do work for Toue they find Aoba and Sei personally interested. When Noiz challenged Aoba and he used his Scrap power again Toue was able to find him and here we are now. Sei is going to be used in this special anniversary brainwashing and probably for the last time as he is dying due to all these experiments. But everything is okay in Toue land because he has found the not dead Aoba and will have a back up Scrapper. Aoba blinks back confused tears and asks why his friends would do this to him, take him to Toue while they know all the evil he does. Virus and Trip are like…what? We don’t like Toue, we like Sei and think he is interesting. And we think you are interesting. And we aren’t giving you to Toue…we want you WOOHOO! Who cares if Toue is taking over the world lalala. Morphine boys, lets play with Aoba. I assume this means really bad things for Aoba but then all of Aoba’s real boyfriends bust in. ALL OF THEM. Even Clear and his bandaids. They can’t allow Aoba to be hurt. Virus and Trip ran away while the other Morphine dudes get their butts kicked. The others act like they want to leave the tower but now Aoba has a mission to find his twin Sei. The others decide to fight Morphine so Aoba can make it out of their safely. Minks is the only one who joins Aoba as well as a more broken Ren. Aoba is concerned with Ren but Ren insists on going on. They run out of the room as Koujaku, Noiz, and Clear use their best abilities to stall for time. Before they run out though Noiz and Aoba both notice Ren is infected with some sort of virus. Aoba yells at Ren for not telling him but all Ren wants to do is help Aoba and not complain. Minks and Aoba finally find Toue and Minks attempts to kill him with a million bullets. Toue is a hologram but that doesn’t matter as he can still use his artificial Scrap power (because it is natural in the twins?) on someone. He starts to affect Minks as the man screams in pain. Then magically Minks gets better because Aoba told him earlier to live and Aoba is stronger than Toue. Toue gets smirky and says let the games begin. Minks decides to go alone to find Toue while Aoba goes…wherever he needs to go. Off Aoba goes but he doesn’t make it very far as he checks on Ren who is not feeling very cute right now. He has been totally infected and attacks Aoba. He bites him and infects him with..something. Oh snap now what is going to happen on this crazy ass show? THE END!

I am guessing this is where the BAD ending for Aoba happens in the game?

This is my face folks. -_________________- My head is made of lines but yes this is my face and how I looked watching this episode. Every once in a while I would make a crazy WTF look and turned to the side, like someone was watching me watch this show and I had to show them my reaction to said show. Show. I shall say show a million more times. Just….just….how is this all possible?!!? Is this show real life? Are aliens going to touch down next episode? Riding in giant mechas? While wearing shorty shorts and having giant boobies? And being zombies? WHAT MORE CAN THIS SHOW HAVE?!

The mayor of Crazyland?

I like that while Aoba and Minks (I actually think his name is Mink but at this point it is drilled into my brain as Minks so…too bad for me) were having their Scrap meeting Toue was off doing some more random brainwashing. Because..he couldn’t send people to capture Aoba and kill Minks and steal his scent rock. BECAUSE THAT WOULD MAKE SENSE! Instead he had to have some announcement about how he has adopted a son or has a son (the translation was weird) that very moment folks. A pre announcement for the celebration that was to come. I have no idea how Toue is going to take over the world if he keeps making these amateur mistakes. How did he get this far in his evil plan if he doesn’t have enough minions on staff?

Well at least he didn't get hit this time....

Aoba and Minks wake up from Scrap land and Aoba is like MOG you want to die and Minks is like….we are the same. Last time I checked Aoba doesn’t want to die. Maybe he smells like death because everyone around him is continuously getting hurt but I guess that isn’t fair. Anyway Aoba tells Minks he needs to live and Minks is like..you know what. Change of heart. I no longer want to use your power to get to Toue. I am going to do this on my own. Peace out. You can stay here alone while I go into danger. Because he certainly would be okay if he was left alone. With no gun or guard. Yeah that was totally going to happen folks. I guess Minks wasn’t thinking clearly, he just…got touched by Aoba’s kindness and since he was going off to die he didn’t want to involve the kid anymore. So off they go together.

Someone suffers from the dramatics....

For about 5 seconds. Because while the cop and his minions are off being Scrapped Toue does have SOME people on staff. None of them know how to shoot but there are some guards. Don’t shoot the guy in blue. Minks and Aoba get separated pretty fast which is bad for Aoba who is alone. Oh wait he has Ren. A tiny dog and no gun. This will end well. He has a bit of a problem when he ran into a dead end but the door was magically opened before he was found by said guards. He can just hide out here and wait for Minks to find him……Or or….that quiet boy will find him. You know, Sei the kid Toue says is his son? The one who is not looking too great? Well after the press conference he painful sat in the chair and looked for Aoba. Then poof….he did something, communicated via magical floating screen to Aoba. At first it looked like this Sei kid was there but he wasn’t so whatevs. And hot damn was Aoba pissed at first. He was all like halt who goes there and Sei shows him that he is the one who sent the useless video game and invite to Platinum Jail. Aoba was like aww hell no you are the one who sent all the people after my best friends forever aren’t you?! I hate you! Let me just attack you with my stern face and…….err my not gun. Sei manages to say all he wanted was for Aoba to find him and use his Scrap power to break him because he is at his limit before he poofs into the breeze. Aoba is like….great now I got to find this Sei guy and hear his sob story so I feel bad for him and want to save/love him later. Just great.

Did I mention that Scrap doesn't work on these two because of contact lenses and earrings? Because yeah....

Aoba doesn’t make it very far in making his harem larger because he gets hit on the head. I am sure he has brain damage now from all the blows to the head this kid has taken. So who is next on private time with Aobaness? Oh look it is the not blond twins Virus and Trip. I haven’t bothered to learn which is which since they do look the same and basically answer each others questions and finish the others sentences. Anyway so you know how they have been….well not really seen that much but when they have been around they drop info that they really shouldn’t know (IE the cops coming for him) . So SURPRISE they are really Morphine. The head of Morphine because we already have seen Morphine this entire time. We know that Toue uses this group to get more brainwashed recruits and what not. So…yeah is this great reveal anything amazing? Virus and Trip work for Toue. They have been grooming this kid for a while. They will take him to Toue now. And Aoba will use Scrap on them to heal their minds and ask them to join his harem.

I just...I just don't even know...

Or not one of those things happened at all. We did however get a giant walk down memory lane. One that involved Jesus riding a dinosaur on the way to Mount Doom to stop the Zombie Apocalypse from occurring. I mean…..really folks. Really. How much more convoluted did this back-story needed to be? I mean I guess Aoba could have been an alien. Or born a girl. A transgendered alien who is actually straight with all these gay boys trying to impregnate him. Who is actually a giant crystal that can power a giant mecha buried deep on the moon. I am saying all of this in a joking manner but this is how I seriously felt watching this episode. I had to pause this episode several times because I couldn’t believe what was being told. I felt as if every possible WTF moment was crammed into this show/game just for the shock factor, who cares if it makes any sense. Just….while I know this show isn’t possible in real life some realm of reality would have been appreciated. Instead we got Sharknado 3: In Space.

Born from what?!?!

I don’t even know where to begin. I guess it would have been natural if Toue was Aoba’s dad. I think while Toue said at the beginning of the episode Sei was his son he really doesn’t see either boys like that. But I am sure these test tubes babies had Toue’s sperm or specially picked sperm. Mom is unknown. Grams might actually think of herself as a Grandmother since she was behind their creation accidentally. Not sure how her studying the brain made it possible to create such special babies but we are just supposed to nod and feel bad for Grams being used. Also we are supposed to nod our heads with the fact that Aoba and Sei were born connected by their thread hair. Do you see my face folks? Do you? What the hell does nerve hair have to do with anything? It hurts when someone touches Aoba’s hair but how does that have to do with their powers? Maybe next time when Aoba finds Sei it will turn out they shared thoughts through that hair and being separated made it hurt. I have no idea. If you are designing these babies and they were connected in some way why not disconnect them? Probably for the same reason that Aoba was born dead. That probably would entail being born. From a vagina. Or stomach. Aoba and Sei were floating around in test tube goo like test tube babies usually are. So……….how was Aoba born dead? Wouldn’t he just be dead dead? Like not alive, stopped growing. I am not sure how Aoba was born dead but then again I am not sure how a dead Aoba would have been used by Toue. Like dance dead fetus dance. But Grams left that part out of her amazing story with Aoba 2 days ago. That she ran away to the island…that Toue bought. Because that is what I would do, run towards more danger.

So two years ago...not a tiny Aoba. I see.

But wait…there’s more. The next one’s a screamer. Okay it really isn’t but whatever. So Toue had Sei the entire time while Aoba was living a life of happiness with Grams. You know that scene of younger Aoba in the hospital, the one where he lost his parents or whatever. Well it turns out that Aoba had this accident about 5 minutes before the anime started. Or recently as Aoba got into Rhyme, caught Noiz, Virus, and Trip’s attention, and had an “accident” during the time Koujaku was off not having fun. So all this Morphine crap from ten years ago is confusing and doesn’t apply to Aoba. The kid played Rhyme last year and has apparently been having problems controlling his power for a while, not just recently. He hurt someone during a Rhyme game and Trip and Virus were like…well this is interesting, let us hurt Aoba so we can keep this under wraps so we can rape him later. Some sort of logic. Grams was okay with the outcome because it helped hide who Aoba was but I guess Noiz was around and saw this happen too thus his insistence. It is actually Noiz’ss fault that all these bad things are happening to Aoba as Toue was going on with life with just Sei as his slave. But once Aoba used his power again in Rhyme Toue was all over that. How dare you Noiz! Well I guess Aoba was on the island and the entire island is in danger so it’s not too big of a deal.

But but....I thought we were pals. You like Toue more than me?!

What part of this magical tale of every possible WTF moment did Aoba find the most upsetting? That Trip and Virus do not love him and want to be part of his harem. And I don’t even think I am being sarcastic with that one. He really thought they were bros but now they are Morphine working for Toue. Well they are more like private contractors. And while Aoba is going on about how evil Toue is and that Virus and Trip shouldn’t work for him they are like oh we know he sucks. We just stick around for the free cookies and what not. Sei is cool with his super power and you are cool with your super power. By the way that twin brother I just told you about..you might want to spend some time with him soon because he is dying do to over experimentation. But we aren’t going to let Toue get his hands on you despite just being in his tower. We are just going to walk out of here and do the awful things Tenchi saw on the internet. Hint: One of their Allmates is a snake. You do the math.

How are you even moving?

Just then the cavalry comes rolling in. All of them. Because all of the security was on break at the same time. Koujaku, Noiz, not dead Clear, and Minks the man full of smiles. All of them there to save their man. Aoba is a good person and is incapable of doing anything alone so he must be saved. I think I blinked or something because I really don’t know where Virus and Trip ended up. They aren’t dead but the gang was really fighting Morphine and the security people who stopped watching Aliens for the 728473 time to do their job. Aoba recovers fast from his almost assault and allows his men to rescue him. Only he wants to continue on the mission alone. Aoba acts like he has a special thing to do now but wasn’t the plan always to take out Toue? It just seemed like a special moment where everyone has to verbalize that they have Aoba’s back and they will let him go off alone….to do something dangerous. Oh okay. Minks goes along too because he apparently needs more time with Aoba.

Thanks for the diagnosis from halfway across the room.

Koujaku, Noiz, and Clear stay behind to not kill anyone as Aoba runs off with someone who is the most questionable in the whole group. Koujaku and Clear want to waste energy and punch anything that moves while Noiz is like haha suckers. This entire series is supposed to be about technology and want not. Let me hack a few things and get me a new weapon dog hahaha! But on the flip side Aoba has a nice piece of technology that might be acting up. His Allmate Ren downloaded something on the main computer earlier and in return he probably got something in him. Noiz (before Aoba left the room) confirms it is a worm. Aoba gets a little ticked at Ren for hiding this for him. It literally happened about 20 minutes ago in real time so what could Aoba or Ren have done differently? Noiz doesn’t have time to help him and if they stop they might get hurt. So Ren…I guess he thought he was helping Aoba by keeping it a secret. He wants to aid Aoba but I guess he should have told Aoba so maybe Aoba could have shut him off? It wasn’t like he was in use. Could have paused whatever it was in Ren and perhaps helped him later. Since Minks already pointed out that Allmates could be used as weapons in this tower.

Aoba Scrapped me by talking normal. Take that old man!

Everything starts to get fuzzy at this point because I watched this several days ago and I am a slacker. I know Minks doesn’t give two cupcakes about Ren’s problems and presses on. They finally reach the place where Toue is supposed to be and TADA he is there in all his stupid glory. I like how he pretends to not know Minks. Like yeah I run around and try to kill so many people they all blend together at this point. But then he was oh yeah I remember you….and guess what? I have Scrap power and I can see into your soul. And then it gets weird . I think it does since my memory is fuzzy. Minks wants to take out Toue but die as well because he has the survivor guilts. Toue then does something to Minks to make him…live? I don’t know. Make him suffer more I suppose. Like let me throw my weight around and not give you what you want. The Minks suffering lasts about 3 seconds before Minks is okay. Like you know what…you making me live isn’t going to work because my new best friend Aoba already used Scrap on me and helped heal my heart so you can’t make me do something I don’t want to do…because Aoba already is. SO THERE! I think that is what happened anyway.

Say it ain't so cute baby Ren!

Toue smirks and Minks pumps him full of lead. Turns out to be another hologram because Toue doesn’t want all this fun to end. Too much fun folks. So Minks has decided to go on and kill Toue and tells Aoba to do what he needs to do. We all know that Aoba means to find Sei but Minks doesn’t know what and should assume Aoba’s plan is to stop Toue as well. With harsh language, not weapons of course. But this gives Aoba and Minks another excuse to separate so we can have a boyfriend moment next week. It seems as if AI robot Ren is going to get a turn. According to very…lovely pics on the internet. How is this going to happen? Well Ren has been infected by a computer virus that has slowly taken over him and he is no longer cute. He has bitten Aoba and…suddenly this magical computer virus has now infected Aoba and he isn’t feeling too well. What have you done Ren and how can Aoba be infected with a computer virus? Because folks. Aliens.