Monday, March 14, 2011

Hakuouki Hekketsuroku episode 8: And then there were two and a half

I want to know why every other time I make spaghetti it tastes like a soggy gross mess but my husband makes it perfect every time. Am I seriously that bad at cooking that I can’t even manage to boil water? This is bad folks.

Putting aside the fact that I am truly pathetic I hope everyone got to work on time today. I heard that iPhones were being special today. I say I heard when really I heard the alarm going off at the wrong time and my husband was late to work, my brother was late to work, and my friend in AZ had a phone automatically change the time even though her state doesn’t even do Daylight Savings Time. But if you were late hopefully your bosses were understanding or were later than you.

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Best leader EVER!

It is time to blog Hakuouki Hekketsuroku episode 8. I don’t know why I didn’t blog this show last week. I think I was in denial about my favorite hottie. But now I has the anger so you know. Who cares. Spoilers for the show losing its mind!



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No one should ever copy that mustache!

Episode Summary: Hijikata and Chizuru make it to whatever city they were going to and find that Sannan is nowhere around. The dude in charge of part of the army has been trying to reach official at the nearby castle but no one will answer the door. Oh and there have been murders in the area. All of this leads Hijikata to believe that Sannan has gone rogue and is nomming on people. Chizuru makes tea because that is all she is good for. While doing laundry (okay she is good at two things) Heisuke comes up saying he hasn’t been able to contact them because he has been too busy stalking Sannan. Apparently he is working with Koudou who supports the New Government. Then Koudou walks up and is like Chizuru comes with me if you want to live. Koudou drugs Chizuru and drags her useless body away as Heisuke is fighting oni zombies and hissing at the daylight. When Chizuru wakes up Koudou reveals that he did everything for Chizuru, that he wants her to rule this oni zombie army. Chizuru is like….no but I love you Daddy so much!!! Sannan then sits down on this family reunion saying he wants to create a new NEW government so oni/zombies have a safe place to live.

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Um...you are more mad at Sannan than your own father?!

Hijikata and Heisuke show up and go AHA we have found you. Then Sannan is like AHA all the oni zombie are in this castle right now. Hijikata says I will never use this oni zombie army…and Sannan is like oh okay. And starts killing them ALL. Because he was on team Aniston the entire time. The three men morph into onis to kill the less intelligent ones. Koudou is like no my precious!!! Chizuru is like let’s go dad and we can be happy later. Koudou then throws himself in front of some swords to protect Chizuru. Chizuru cries and forgives her fake dad as he dies. Hijikata pretends that their fate won’t be the same as the other zombie oni when Sannan and Heisuke fall to the ground. They both confess they are at the end of the lifespan now and wanted to go out as heroes or something. Sannan says he was always on team Hijikata and apologizes to Chizuru for all those times he tried to eat her. Heisuke tells Chizuru to smile and keep on going in life. Everyone holds hands until Heisuke and Sannan turn into sand. Hijikata is all sad but gets more troops and there are great plans to win this war. But he orders Chizuru to stay behind as he doesn’t want her hurt. Chizuru actually listens this time but now no one is left to protect her so maybe it was a bad time to start following orders. THE END!

What the hell was that folks? Just what the hell?!?

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JUST DO IT!!!!!!!!

I was so looking forward to Hijikata to slicing Sannan into 15 million pieces. Ever since that emo whiner got injured in what like episode 2 I wanted him to die. He was sneaky and him becoming the first oni warrior was like…um no. Could we have picked a worse person to try this out?

But he has been FORGIVEN ya’ll. He was just PRETENDING to be a creepier. He really wasn’t working with the enemy. He actually liked Hijikata. And he apologized to Chizuru. Life is amazing.

Or how about not. How about we actually make sense show? How come after all I have been through and all the hot men I have lost in this show that I couldn’t get my one wish of Sannan dying a traitor and Hijikata doing the deed? WHY FOLKS!!!

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Anger all over my face!!!!

First of all I am mad that Harada’s death was meaningless. I mean I am glad that he died thinking he was a hero. That is some comfort. But in the end his death meant nothing. Koudou made even MORE oni zombie people and beat Hijikata to wherever they were going. So….yeah. Woohoo. Obviously Harada only died to protect Shiranui because Koudou is alive and kicking with brand new peoples. But I guess Chizuru and Hijikata will go on without knowing what Harada did for them. I am not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing though.

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I DID THIS ALL FOR YOU!!!

Second of all…what the hell?!?! Koudou gets redeemed too? What’s next, is Chikage and Hijikata going to leave Chizuru so they can run off into the sunset together? I DO NOT GET IT!!! This man was responsible for countless deaths and tricking the Shinsengumi into thinking his potion was a viable way to stay alive. He treated Chizuru’s twin like crap but acting like Chizuru was SO SPECIAL. This was all for her even though he left her all alone in the world and set off to make an army of human demons for her?

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....So everything was meaningless. Awesome.

Just no folks. Say no to crazy. And I wish that Chizuru would have had some brains or balls to say hey YOU SUCK. But no no folks. Chizuru proved until the very end she is a moron. She has to forgive him because she is the perfect anime girl. And she is dumb. Like maybe forgive a father for not picking you up from soccer practice. And maybe forgive him for being a drunk all your life. But I think things will be okay if you hate your “father” who created countless zombies and cost the lives of some of your friends.

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I think Hijikata is out of tears. X__X

AND THEN HEISUKE DIED!!! Like are we on a deadline and we must kill all the Shinsengumi before the last episode? Because I am counting and we have three. That guy dude I never bothered learning his name, Shinpachi who has been gone for quite awhile, and Hijikata who is slowly losing his men, mind, and the only person to entertain Chizuru. Like this show is amazing folks!!!!

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Anime is for kids folks! This is the proof!

Heisuke dying was sad. His hand turning into sand in Hijikata’s almost made me cry. He didn’t really have a choice in terms of being all zombie oni so him dying is tragic. I wonder if he knew about Okita and Saito dying. Oh yes I have accepted Saito has died. Because everyone else is dead. He just didn’t fall into sand piles on the ground. But yes even if Heisuke knew the others died no one really seems broken up about that. They are manly men who just keep on going.

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Dude your odds were looking good since EVERYONE ELSE IS DEAD!!!

Obviously I have lost my mind. But Heisuke is dead, I am sad, and at a time I thought he and Chizuru would make the best pair. Okita got taken out in the running pretty early with his sickness and Saito was too married to honor to marry a woman. That and Heisuke was closer in age to Chizuru and they could be more natural together. I like how Heisuke tried to cheer up Chizuru in the very end and all of them holding hands in a moment of BRAVENESS was sweet.

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WTF IS THIS BULLSHIT?!

And Sannan wasn’t evil. He was just pretending. He has been pretending since episode 3 obviously. I am not buying this bullshit. Sannan should have stuck to his character and went out a creepy asshole. And really it sounds like he was made into a good guy when actually he had plans to make a zombie army all along. Just when he found out Hijikata was not on board he killed them all since he wouldn’t be around to lead them himself. But it is bullshit that he was actually killing rogue oni zombies all this time and was really a good guy. BULLSHIT.

On a more positive note I am actually understanding more about this Japanese history stuff. Which is good to know with only 2 episodes left. But yes my travel books have some of the history on Japan so now I have a better understanding of what is going on. And despite the fact that America just DEMANDED that Japan trade with them…I am kinda on team New Government. X__X Which is super weird after thinking the hotties were defending their way of life and it was magical and stuff.

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With my new learnings I know this will end well!

In the next episode I expect Shinpachi to show up and get killed by Chikage and Chizuru to cry some more. Because every single person she has ever talked to is going to die. Too bad Hijikata won’t be the first to have the disappearing sand hand scene.

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Hijikata needs a hug but is running out of people to give him one.


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